Breaking News: North Korean Tensions a Result of Supreme Court Hearings on Same Sex Marriage. God is Pissed!

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Rick Wiles, the Trunews broadcaster who has called President Obama “a devil from hell,” conducted an interview with Southern Baptist Convention President, Fred Luter, on Wednesday.  In it, Wiles and Luter suggested that recent tensions with North Korea are a result of god’s anger over the Supreme Court hearings on same sex marriage.  Not only that, but they even went so far as to say that the United States is likely to be destroyed, just like the biblical cities of Sodom and Gomorrah, should the Supreme Court rule in favor of it.  Let’s take a look at some excerpts.  (Along with a bit of commentary from yours truly, of course.)

Wiles: You know at precisely the same time the Supreme Court is hearing these arguments on same-sex marriage in Asia a crazy man in possession of nuclear weapons, Kim Jong-un, is openly saying: I have ordered our military to position our rockets on US targets in Hawaii, Japan, Guam and the mainland of the United States.  He has gone into a full state of war this week.  I don’t know, Pastor Luter, I don’t know if anybody is — I know they’re not — they’re just not putting this together.  You got this happening over here and you got this happening over here: could the two be connected? Could our slide into immorality be what is unleashing this mad man over here in Asia to punish us?

Luter: It could be a possibility, I’m not that strong in prophecy but I would not be surprised that there’s not a connection there simply because of the fact we’ve seen it happen in scripture before. I would not be surprised that at the time when we are debating same-sex marriage, at a time when we are debating whether or not we should have gays leading the Boy Scout movement, I don’t think it’s just a coincidence that we have a mad man in Asia who is saying some of the things that he’s saying.

This is the same old load of disgusting garbage that we hear spewing from the mouths of evangelicals, every time that there is a major disaster, or threat of one.  “We made God angry, so he’s punishing us.”  Aside from the offensiveness of the idea that affording equal rights to all people is a punishable offense, you would think that, after thousands of years of accumulating knowledge on what ACTUALLY causes natural phenomena and human behavior, we could move past this ridiculous, primitive notion that everything bad that happens is the result of some fictional, cosmic bully’s displeasure.

Wiles: I have to admit I’m at a loss to understand the complacency and apathy of tens of millions of American Christians who are standing by, twiddling their thumbs while their nation is transformed into a socialist, homosexual, anti-God, anti-biblical morality cesspool.

Well, what can I say, Rick?  Witch burning, heretic torturing, crusade waging Christians are just getting harder and harder to come by, these days.  About your comment that the U.S. is becoming an “anti-biblical morality cesspool,” though, I think I’m pretty ok with that.  That’s probably because I am ABSOLUTELY anti-biblical morality, just as any reasonable person who has ever actually read the bible would be.  Because, anyone who has knows that “biblical morality” includes murdering children who disrespect their parents, as well as women who aren’t virgins on their wedding nights, forcing rape victims to marry their rapists, endorsing slavery, genocide and infanticide, and a whole slew of other unsavory things.  With all of that put into perspective, I think that it’ safe to say that anyone who has actually read the bible, and still supports the idea of “biblical morality,” is either engaging in some astonishing cognitive dissonance, or is completely insane.

Wiles: If the Supreme Court rules that same-sex marriage is a constitutional right, what are the ramifications for this nation?

You mean, other than gay people being able to get married, and our nation taking a long overdue step towards affording equal rights to all people?  Hmmm…I’m having trouble thinking of any, at the moment.

Luter: Oh man I would hate to think of it. You talked about Sodom and Gomorrah in your introduction and I can just see that happening man, it would be like America is pointing its finger at God and saying: ‘I know what your word says God, I know what the scripture says but we want to be our own king, we want to do things our own way.’ The last time a nation did that they were destroyed, Sodom and Gomorrah was destroyed. I just see things getting consistently worse in America because of our decisions that we’ve made to just get farther and farther away from God and God’s word.

“The last time a nation did that they were destroyed, Sodom and Gomorrah was destroyed.”  Actually, there are plenty of more recent instances of citizens actively deciding that the bible doesn’t dictate their moral laws, many of which took place right here, in the U.S.  For a few examples, see: abolition of slavery, legalization of interracial marriage, affording of equal rights to women, criminalization of marital rape, oh, and not to forget the establishment clause, and that first line in the Treaty of Tripoli, which begins: “As the Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion…” Of course, these are only a few out of numerous examples.  So far, I haven’t seen this mass destruction of our nation that you claim inevitably results from things like this, Fred.  Is your god just taking it easy on us?  That seems a bit out of character for him, all things considered.

Wiles also urged Christians to stop going to work, as a form of protest against the United States’ immoral ways.

Wiles: The country, the economic system would be on the verge of collapse if ten million productive Christians… simply said ‘we’re going to sit things out until this craziness stops,’ I think it would be over in a couple days.

Ahhhh, I see your reasoning, here, Rick.  Obviously, the best way to stop a nation from descending into a pit of chaos would be to cripple its economic system.  Genius!

Luter: That would be powerful, that would be a phenomenal statement to America and I think also to the world. The challenge would be getting those ten million Christians together to make it happen.

Wiles: Apparently they don’t believe the Gospel enough.

So, you’re saying that people value their livelihoods and ways of life more than a ridiculous, immoral code of ethics that was thought up by primitive men, in the bronze age?  Oh, the tragedy of it all.

Luter: I agree, we need about ten million Rick Wileses in the world, it would be radical.

Wiles: That would be a scary thought.

On that, Rick, we most certainly agree.

-J.C.

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